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"Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life." (Proverbs 13.12)

So many times in my life, I feel I am met with "hope deferred" as opposed to "longing fulfilled". I remain hopeful, but my heart does get pretty sick from time to time.

I'm single. Sometimes, it seems I may be that way for quite a while. I have hope, but also fear. I fear that I may screw something up, or perhaps I've already screwed something up. Perhaps, because of my own inadequacy (I can be down-right strange sometimes), I will be destined to walk this earth alone, without a partner. I'm afraid others will take what God may be providing because I'm trying to be "wise" and wait for "His timing". But that doesn't change the fact that that is what He is asking me to do right now. Can I be content, waiting? Can I trust Him to provide? Will He even provide this for me?

I look forward to those trees of life. I want life to the full, and I believe that that is what God has promised me. Can I believe that that is what He's given me right now?

It's hard.